Thursday, August 26, 2010

Tell me

I haven't written poetry in a long time. I just got inspired to write something for my nieces and nephews cause I love them and they are the closest thing to children I have so far. This is for Jessica, Ryan, Aiden and Faith:

Here is goes: Its called "Tell me"

Tell me about your deepest fears
Even things you think I don't want to hear
Tell me about all your hopes and dreams
Tell me about the things that make you want to scream
Tell me about your secret crush
All the things that make you blush
Tell me about your daily ups and downs
The things that make you smile, that make you frown
Tell me whats your favorite movie and favorite song
Tell me what you think is right and what is wrong
I want us to have late night chats one on one
Cause spending time with you is always fun
So Tell me all the things that break your heart
Don't leave anything out, not one single part
Tell me the things that make you swoon
Tell me later or tell me soon
But tell me everything about what makes you, you
because i want to know all the old and all the new
Because I love you so much today and always
Because I want to know everything about you, inside and out, up, down and sideways

Thursday, August 19, 2010

This past weeks highlights

So many things have "moved" me in postive ways this past week. Joe and I went to see his uncle play in Hunt Valley and his band was really awesome! Joe's friends ended up showing up and we were so surprised. The one wife I hadn't met before told Joe that she thought I was really beautiful. Wow, that was so nice to hear from someone I had just met. Joe tells me all the time, but I am too hard on myself and as positive as I try to be, I don't walk around thinking I am hot stuff. Then it was off to my co-workers wedding on Monday. It was really nice and she looked absolutely radiant. I started tearing up because I remember how happy I felt on our wedding day and how powerful the vows really are. This isn't just a pretty ceremony, this is the rest of your life! But my favorite part was when my very cute and funny co-worker Darlene pointed out that Joe and I have the same kind of personality, which is what my sister said when she first met Joe too. And then she said, "that is so special and your love will last forever" and I really love to hear that other people see what we have and how awesome it really is.
# 3 moving experience came yesterday when my friend from Tai Sophia posted a video of a young man in China who had lost both his arms in an electrical accident and plays the piano beautifully with his...FEET!! WOW! I always used to joke that with my long finger toes that I could type and play the piano, but I, in fact, can not do either of those things. This was so inspiring and I reminded myself that I should be SO GRATEFUL for everything I have. Not just my arms, but everything, my sight (i work with two ladies who are blind so I am reminded of this daily) my hearing, my mind, my love, my friends and family. Everything.
But then came last night, the pms monster came out and I screamed and kicked and cried like a spoiled child because of the continued computer issues and my frustrations about us being able to buy a house before I get pregnant. Same problems different day. I forgot last night to be grateful and enjoy my last night with my husband before he left for 3 nights. Which I am also a huge whiny cry baby about. I lived alone for a long time and now I can't even make it a few nights by myself? When did that happen?
I need to remember what I learned from the book A New Earth and its basically this simple: life and the world are indeed insane and chaotic and I can't control them. Be present in the moment and enjoy it before its gone. And be grateful, so grateful for all of my countless blessings. Sometimes I need to be reminded.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Mo' Gadgets, Mo' Distraction, Mo' Money down the drain!

So this post is a continuation of the last one about feeling like I am chained to my computer. If you have read all of my posts you know that early last month I got lost in Chevy Chase/DC due to a detour creating by the police blocking off East West Highway. This led me to purchase my GPS. So I put it in the car this morning and I think, I will probably not need to use this that much. I do have a bridal shower to go to on Sunday in the dreaded DC and I hope that my GPS will aid me along the journey. I did however find myself staring at the GPS and feeling like it was "neat" and "cool" distracting me from the road. Also, while driving it slid off my dashboard causing the windshield wipers to go on full blast. I could probably just get by with my trusty mapquest directions but I am sure I will need it one day when I am lost. And I hate nothing more than being lost!
The most infuriating thing that has happened again is that we have lost another adapter for our stupid Dell laptop. We have gotten 3 replacements and they all stop working after a very short time. I think its our computer. Joe thinks it might be the outlet which requires the light to be on for the computer to charge. I just want to throw my hands up and succumb to purchasing a mac which i have heard is much better because they don't get viruses. It seems like Joe and I always have a virus or what seems to be one. I have had it with technology!! I want to stop wasting so much money on it but I am addicted to the internet. Joe and I in our old age love to look anything up that we can't remember like what other movies a certain actor is from, etc. In fact last night in all my rage and fury, I said to Joe that the definition of insanity is repeating the same action and expecting a different result (hence us buying yet ANOTHER adapter when we know its just going to stop working AGAIN). Then I asked Joe who said that and he said Einstien, but I couldn't look it up because I couldn't use the computer and I couldn't order a new computer because I couldn't use the one we have!! Insanity I tell you!! Isn't there more to life then all of this? We need to save every penny for the house we can't afford to buy, so for now I will sit back and wait for our 3rd or 4th adapter to come and be mad about the money we are wasting paying for internet service we can't use.. AGAIN! So frustrating!!