Monday, February 28, 2011

Where It Landed!

Ok, people, now I will return to telling funny stories from my life, what this blog's purpose is, to make myself and others laugh at life, specifically my life. We all need to laugh more. I will get back to talking about music and tv shows that I love later.
This was inspired by my sweet and funny friend Sherilin over at
Since she is shares my plight of the over-sized, bodacious ta-tas! Women claim to want big boobs, but the women who actually have them know all the pain and utter BS that comes along with having them. These include trouble finding a supportive, comfortable bra, back pain, sweating issues, men's leering and uncomfortable stares or comments, trouble being able to wear certain shirts (I gave up button downs all together because of the buckling and appearance), dresses, and I don't have to go over what happens as you age and gravity is a cruel force of nature.
But this post is about cleavage and the bigger the boobs you have the bigger and longer the cleavage!
So, there I was in high school out at Bennihana, a Japanese Steakhouse where they prepare the food right in front of you. It was my yearbook class celebrating the end of the year and another successful publication.  It must have been warm and I was wearing a V-neck or scoop neck short sleeve shirt.  As you know you all sit around a table as a big group and they chop, and fry up all the delicious food as you watch. Well some of the chefs are more energetic and entertaining than others. This chef decided to play a fun game with us and throw little pieces of shrimp or chicken on our plates. So then it was my turn and he tossed and you guessed landed right in my cleavage!!! Everyone had a great roaring laugh, there was shouts of glee, there was pointing and carrying on. I sat there red-faced and horrified and yet, again, embarrassed of my crazy-large breasts.

I will also take this opportunity to re-iterate my feelings about curvy, so called "plus-sized" women like myself. We shouldn't be referred to as "plus size" because we are average. That's right, the average American woman isn't a size 5, or even a size 9-10, she is more than likely a size 12 or 16/18. So I will re-post one of my favorite websites dedicated to celebrating these "plus-size" models called "The Judgement of Paris" and include a picture of one of them, the beautiful Kaillee O'Sullivan and an Irish lassy like myself also!

Photo courtesy of

I will also include a clip of the Lane Bryant commercial that was recently banned from ABC and Fox for being too racy. The model who was featured in the commercial made a very good point she said something like and I am paraphrasing, "Those Victoria Models can prance around in their bras and panties but you feature someone who has a little bit more and they ban it. Really? 
Well, when I watch it, all I can think to myself is POWER TO THE "REAL" WOMEN!!! Too sexy, huh? yeah, not so "fat" or "plus size" now are we??


  1. That got banned? That's ridiculous. A woman with curves is a beautiful thing.

  2. I was a bit disappointed when you started talking about over-sized, bodacious ta-tas and said it was a post about cleavage. I was expecting pictures.


    Seriously, though, it's sad how many women get caught up in what the the fashion designers & media call attractive. Personally, those stick figures are anything but attractive.

  3. I'm afraid I was obviously at the back of the queue when it came to handing out cleavages, so I envy you very much!! However, I do have friends who have large boobs, and I know that they do suffer with chronic back pain and the sweating etc. We are what we are, and should be grateful for it!

  4. @George, well thanks, that is nice to hear!
    @Vinny - Sorry no pictures, haha, and I couldn't agree more about skinny women who look like 14 year old boys
    @Thisisme - I know I should be proud but they can be quite taxing and trouble-some, but you are right! :)

  5. That got banned?
    But, two questions:
    1. Did she only put a coat on over her underwear? If so, I hope she's not going to Chuck E. Cheese.
    2. Was it shrimp or chicken which was flung into your shirt? If the latter, would it be safe to say you had a chicken breast?

  6. Did that rock your world Al? Haha, I have gotten a strong male response today, makes sense I guess!
    Answers 1) I am not sure but I hope not Chuck E. Cheese either! haha
    2) I don't really remember if it was chicken or shrimp, but I quickly removed it with a napkin probably. You are a silly one!

  7. how exciting to get tagged in a boobie post! yay for the girls with the girls!
    hahahaha! al's funny with his chicken breast!
    i need my kid to leave the room so i can watch the banned commercial just in case it's really so bad. then again, with me as her mom, it's probably nothing she hasn't already seen.

  8. that's a good looking woman in that commercial! i don't blame men for liking women - we're very appealing even when we're not scrawny.

  9. That IS a good looking woman in that commercial, the woman's body is the most beautiful thing in the world, I love men but we are waaay sexier and visually appealing! :)

  10. Psst! JD...

    *speaks in low voice*

    Those chefs at Bennihana? They do that on purpose whenever they are blessed to have a particularly lovely view of cleavage within shot. Consider it a compliment, love.~ ;-)

    *normal voice*
    That's why I ALWAYS put a napkin in front of my shirt if the chef decides to do the toss food at you trick. ;-)

  11. Oh, man!! I have to ask what happened next?? Did you just have to reach into your shirt and pull it out? (I don't know how that question comes across!!)

    Thanks for the laugh!

  12. @Katsidhe - You are right, he DID do it on purpose! haha! That is smart, I am not very lady like with proper napkin placement and I was in highschool so you know..
    @Jess - I don't know what I did probably removed it with said napkin or my hand very quickly to try to stop the loud laughter!

  13. The ad really did rock my world. Is that bad?

  14. No, not at all! She is hhaaawwwwtt! :)

  15. hubba hubba... me like. :-)thanks for the heads up. if only my name were Dan! okay, so i'm gonna pretend that's really my name and FINISH that ad in my head.

    i loved the boob story btw. and the guy with the chicken breast tid bit. <-- lol

  16. Thanks Nerd Girl! I just knew you would dig it!